When you are very spiritually connected with 'G-d'/The Universe/The Divine
(please switch off if you do not understand what this means because it will sound too *esoteric)
... when you are spiritually 'awake' and have a good connection with the divine/universe/G-d
You feel.
You know the unknown
You have unexplainable dreams, premonitions, visualisations
During meditation, you can realise a lot
You area able to 'see' beyond the 3D
To go onto 5D reality, which is beyond the 3D, earthly matters
For some time now, I have been seeing and sensing children, when I am in meditation
Recently, I have been seeing a lot to do with children in the 3D world
Children, coming up to me, smiling at me, talking to me, randomly
There are many new births at the moment, friends of mine are becoming grandparents, and mothers and fathers
I keep seeing a child, one that I know is in existence, and has something to do with me.
I am not entirely sure how we are connected
This child continuously comes to my mind, or consciousness, or dreams
It upsets me
It is as if I am unhappy about it
Yet, I do not know why
I love kids
I see it as a boy
A very young child
Other times I see it as a child not yet born
I consistently see feet
Tiny feet of a child
It has a connection to me, on a spiritual level, not biological
I am confused as to why this child has some relevance to my life
I feel as if the person who is the biological 'parent' is spiritually connected to me on a soul level
So therefore, I have a spiritual connection to the child
You see, this sounds very abstract
It is
Esoteric is abstract
I am trying not to get fixated on it
My senses continuously go to this unexplainable child
As odd as it sounds, I feel this child
It's not my child, I am just very subconsciously aware of it
None of this sounds rational
The subconscious, the spirit is not rational
These feelings have been consistent since the early Autumn, 2018
I was in the bath, crying convulsively
I was in so much emotional pain
I felt as if I was pushing a child out of me, pushing something 'sexual' away from me It felt like repulsion, rejection and disgust
It was like I was giving birth to something repulsive, that I was rejecting from my body because it had so badly injured me, internally
After this I felt a surge of disloyalty and deception
That I had been deceived so badly, and was in emotional excruciating pain as a result of something to do with sex or sexual relations that I was a part of but not participating in (through choice)
As if I was participating in this because I was in some way connected, not through my own personal choice, through the choice of another
I did not know what it was, but I felt it was about a birth or a conception that I was not a part of, but somehow was
I felt distraught with a sense of betrayal
I was very shaken up
There will be an answer, let it be
*Esoteric - intended for or likely to be understood by only a small number of people with a specialized knowledge or interest.
"esoteric philosophical debates"
synonyms: abstruse, obscure, arcane, recherché, rarefied, recondite, abstract, difficult, hard, puzzling, perplexing, enigmatic, inscrutable, cryptic, Delphic, oracle
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